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Serve your child custody and support papers

After you file your custody and support forms, you must give the other parent a copy. The legal word for this is serve.

 

You can’t serve the papers yourself. Someone else — called a server — must give them the papers. The court needs proof this was done the right way before your case can move forward.

 

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What it means to serve papers

Serving means someone — not you — gives the court papers to the other parent in the case.

The court needs proof they got the papers. This protects both of you. It gives the other parent a chance to respond before the court makes decisions.

️ For more help to understand service, watch a short video about how to serve. Then, follow the step-by-step instructions below.

The other parent has 30 days to respond

You can't move your case forward until you serve the other parent. Once they are served, they have 30 days to respond. After that, your case can move forward even if they don’t respond. 

How to serve the Summons and Petition for Custody and Support

️ All court form links below open in a new tab.

  • Choose a server

    Your server must:

    • Be 18 or older, and

    • Not be part of your case

    ️ You can’t serve the papers yourself.

    Your server can be:

    • A friend or family member

    • A professional process server

    • A county sheriff (in some areas)
      The sheriff charges to serve papers unless you have a fee waiver

  • Decide when to serve

    You must serve the papers after you file them with the court.

    If you are not asking for a court date:

    • You can serve the papers any time after you file.

    If you are asking for a court date:

    • You must serve the papers at least 16 court days before the court date.

    • If you serve by mail, add 5 calendar days.

      Check with your court to make sure you serve on time.

  • Serve the papers

    Your server must find the other parent and hand them these forms: 

    This is called personal service.

    Personal service is the usual way to serve your papers. Your server

    • Hands the papers directly to the other person, or

    • If the other person won't take the papers, leaves them next to them and tells them what they are

      • For example, your server can leave the papers on the ground next to them and say, "These are important legal papers for you." 

    Can't find the other person

    If your server can't find the other person after multiple tries, you may be able to:

    The other person is willing to sign a form saying they received your papers

    You can usually serve someone by mail if they're willing to sign a Notice and Acknowledgment of Receipt (form FL-117) and return it to you.

    Learn more about service by mail and acknowledgment of receipt

    The other person is outside California

    If they are in another state

    You can always serve someone in another state using personal service. You can also serve them by registered or certified mail with return receipt requested and attach the signed return receipt or similar proof that the documents were delivered. 

    • ️Keep in mind someone else, not you, must mail the papers AND the return receipt must be signed by the person you are serving (with a clear signature).

    If they are in another country

    • The rules depend on what country they are in.

    • You may need to follow the Hague Convention rules.

    • Serving someone in another country can take time and money.

    Talk to your court’s self-help center ️ or a lawyer.

    The other person is in the military

    There are different rules for serving someone on a US base or overseas. In some cases, their commanding officer may be able to serve the papers.

    Talk to your court’s self-help center ️or a lawyer.

    The other person is in jail or prison

    An official at the jail or prison will be your server. Contact the jail, California State prison, or federal prison to find out who does this and how to get them the documents (both links open in a new tab).

    Make sure your server writes down

    • The address they gave the papers to your spouse at
    • The date and time they gave the papers

    They'll need this information to fill out the Proof of Service form.

  • Fill out and file a proof of service

    After serving the papers, your server must:

    1. Fill out Proof of Service of Summons (form FL-115)

      • It helps if you fill in the top part of the form with the case and court information.

      • Your server can then fill in the information about how, when, and where they served the papers.

    2. Sign the form
    3. Give it back to you

    Then you must:

    • Make a copy of the signed form

    • File the original with the court

    The court won’t move forward until this form is filed.

  • Wait for a response

    Once the other person is served, they have 30 days to respond.

    If they do not respond, you can ask the court for a default judgment.

    Learn what to do next in your custody and support case

Get help

You can get free help from your court’s self-help center ️.

They can help you:

  • Figure out how to serve papers

  • Fill out the Proof of Service

  • Ask the court for another way to serve, if needed

Key takeaways

  • You can’t serve papers yourself — someone else must do it.

  • Your server must follow the rules and complete a Proof of Service.

  • You must file the Proof of Service with the court.

  • The other parent has 30 days to respond after being served.

Petition for custody and support

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